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May 2023

May 29th, 2023 
Hello from a cozy corner chair, accessible to the nearest plug I could find in our hospital's cancer wing waiting area.  I've decided this may be my new spot over the next 12 weeks on days Jess tolerates me being her Uber.
Today is her first day of chemotherapy, and I thought perhaps this was the perfect opportunity to touch base with you all.
May has been a blessing in many ways.
It has by far been the longest window of clear weather for spring planting that I can EVER remember. Our crops are planted, corn is already nicely popped up in rows, and the soybeans are just peeking their cute little cotyledon faces out of their soil beds.
 (did I actually just say cotyledon?? Mark will be proud.)
The canola has been in full bloom for three full weeks now, our barley is already headed out, and wheat isn't too far behind. 
AND… if you can believe it… we got our first cut haylage done.
Life continues to carry on.
Nature continues to create and grow.
And the new life of these crops is just maybe what the doctor ordered as we venture into what is hopefully Jess's last step in this ordeal.
Today we arrived early to the hospital, but were warned these chemo days would be filled with long waits.
But within minutes of registering, an angel of a nurse named Dawn appeared at Jess's side and introduced herself and got us in immediately.
Her regiment is four rounds, with week one being 5 days straight of injections, week two and three only being 1 day each.
The entire process will eat up her summer, but should be completed by mid-August.
It's going to be quick, but intense.
Jess has used May as a time of recovery and rest.  She's read the many books her viewers (and I'm sure many of you here) have so generously gifted her.  I can't tell you how much joy and peace she gets from being able to escape from this all in a good book… so thank you.
As I sit and reflect this month, I realize how much my daily routines have changed, re-prioritized.
Instead of starting my day in front of a computer in an attempt to keep ahead of editing before the actual workday begins… I find myself taking some time to enjoy that first cup of coffee, and hanging out with my new grandpuppy while taking in the smells and sounds of spring outside.
All things I've rushed through each day to keep the hamster wheel turning… to stay productive.
I've relied heavily on Carissa to stay on top chores so I could be free to help Mark and for the first time, I didn't feel guilty that I needed to be two places at once.
(sidenote: today the sheep decided to pull a plug in a water bowl, so I do have THAT to look forward to when I get home). 
Ok… this cozy chair is now starting to give me movie but, so I'll take this as my cue to land the plane.
Thank you all for being on this journey with us.
For being patient as my content just hasn't been pushed as hard or as often as I wish.
As for Jess… this girl continues to amaze me with her positivity as well as her quiet moments of struggle.  She has taken each phase one courageous step at a time, never complaining.
She's leaned on her friends this month, and reconnected with old ones which truly ignited a deeper sense of peace within her somehow.
She shows me everyday that although life may not be fair, it opens our eyes and hearts to what life is like for so many others.
That health is a gift, and perhaps sickness is a reminder to always appreciate that gift.
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